Why I adopted an “I get to” Attitude about Self-Care
There is no self-care genie
No one is coming to rescue you
I know, that’s not what you wanted to hear.
You have to take charge of your self-care. There is no genie coming out of a bottle, or fairy godmother going to clear the calendar, or savior of any form coming to roll out the self-care red carpet. This is sooo irritating and why even the term self-care sounds like nails on a chalkboard. But, it’s true.
You are responsible for your self-care. Your self-care is your job. You have to do it anyway.
Yep that’s right. Another thing to be responsible for. Another “to-do” on your list.
I’m telling you, you get to do your self-care.
Say it like that, “I am in charge of my self-care.” Wait a second, that means I get to do whatever I want, whatever lights me up, whatever my jam is and call it self-care. There are no rules. With an “I get to” attitude, everything changes.
But, wait, what do you mean I have to do self-care?
Now, I’m annoyed!
Fact: It’s your job to prioritize and make self-care part of your life. Your kids, partner, boss, neighbors, volunteer groups, friends, or anyone else isn’t going to move aside and say “Oh you shouldn’t because I know you are stretched too thin and this yes means you don’t have time for yourself.” If that does happen, please let me know! I want to meet you.
Why self-care?
Again, cue that nails on a chalkboard feeling because people have been going on about this self-care stuff forever. It’s that annoying concept of manicures and pedicures and leisurely mid-week lunches. There are no more hours in the day for self-care. So we have to ask permission or give up some responsibility or sleep less. Yes, we do.
Here are some ways I got started with self-care:
I said no to being a room parent and other things I was asked to do for the kid’s school.
I come downstairs by 7 am on weekdays and meditate for 10-15 minutes.
I go to bed by 11 every night (even on weekends).
I got control of my days and assigned errands, walks with friends, and meetings to certain blocks of time (to the best of my ability).
I go to a workout class two days a week.
I make myself a healthy breakfast every morning.
I try to approach life with an “I get to” attitude.
This is not an exhaustive list…
And here’s why. If I don’t take care of myself and I just mean the basics: eat three healthy meals, drink water, and shower daily, I am very grumpy. I am resentful. I am not very nice. And that’s not fun.
But when I started setting the alarm and getting up to meditate, savoring my coffee, taking my vitamins, and going on walks I felt better. I am more pleasant. There are no more hours in the day, but with an “I get to” attitude, I approach tasks from a more positive, mindful place.
You have to ask for it. You have to prioritize it. Just try it and see what you like. What do you want more of in your life? What will you choose to do to take care of yourself?
Not sure where to start on this self-care journey, book a free 30-minute discovery call with me - now that’s an act of self-care!
Rebecca Fellenbaum is a certified life coach, intuitive guide, blogger (yep, you’re reading it right now), and entrepreneur. She helps women who have “made it” on the outside feel great about themselves on the inside so they can find joy in their lives, kids, and families. Get her free guide: Slowing Down: 9 Steps to Live With Intention to start meaning it when you say you’re doing fine.
