Am I doing this right? Meditation 101
The other day a friend asked me if I could offer one piece of advice for someone who wants to make positive changes in their life. Without hesitation, I said meditate. There are so many things I could have said - better sleep habits, eat healthily, get mindful about your drinking, exercise, set boundaries, get serious about self-care, but without a second thought, I said mediate. And I meant it!
Meditation is a practice. Practice. Hold onto that word. A practice. Not an endpoint. Not a goal. Not an arrival at some permanent blissful state of being. A practice. And it can change your life. It has profoundly changed mine. You can devote even 5-10 minutes a day to sitting in stillness and observing your thoughts. You can play quiet music, sit in silence, do a guided meditation, go on a walk, or observe the squirrels in the park. The format doesn’t matter. You get to make it yours.
What is meditation?
Meditation is the act of quieting your mind and observing and choosing your thoughts. It is a chance to turn inwards and be with yourself in body and mind. You can meditate while sitting, lying down, standing, or moving.
Why meditate?
There are many studies like this one from the scientific journal Neural Plasticity that show how meditation changes and improves your brain. It changes the neural pathways in your brain and can reduce the cortisol (stress hormone) in your body. It is also a pleasant experience that relaxes your nervous system and, I think, raises your self-esteem and worthiness. When you meditate you are telling yourself that you care about your well-being and that goes a long way towards self-love.
Am I doing this right?
Yes, you are! Your mind probably won’t get very quiet. We have 70,000-90,000 thoughts a day (more on that in this post) and your mind will be thinking as you meditate. I challenge you to notice the thoughts and consciously let them pass you by. You can imagine them floating away. One of my favorite meditation teachers, davidji, encourages finding the gap between your thoughts. That gap is the stillness you seek.
Finding the time
When incorporating a new practice, it is best to stack the new habit with something you’re already doing. If you already have a workout routine, you can add meditation to either side of that. If you journal every morning, maybe incorporate meditation during that time. If you like to read before bed, try meditation then too. You do have to carve out the time. The good news is meditation can be done any time of day. If someone else in your household or a friend is trying it too, you can do it together. This is a beautiful practice to do with kids - even if they don’t join you directly. You might be amazed that they watch you quietly as they see you doing something important to you. Try setting a timer on your phone to remind you to meditate. And pat yourself on the back when you do it. You are building new neuropathways that can lead to lasting improvements.
Since meditating regularly, I have noticed that I:
Can pause before I react (true confession: I don’t always do this!)
Know how to hear my intuition
Crave meditation because I enjoy that peaceful state of sitting in my calm nervous system
Can find myself in tough moments
Remember to breathe when I feel stressed
Seek out healthier activities and take better care of my body and mind
Am nicer to people
Have kinder thoughts about myself and others
Feel things more deeply
If you’d like to start with something similar but faster and maybe less daunting, check out my previous post about micro-moments. These are 2-3 minute mini meditations you can do during transitions throughout your day. It’s amazing how much they help set you up for success and steady your mind during daily rushing around.
Let me know, do you meditate? How did you start? How do you fit it into your life? What do you like best? And if you’re new to meditation, what do you think? I’d love to hear from you.
Rebecca Fellenbaum is a certified life coach, intuitive guide, blogger (yep, you’re reading it right now), and entrepreneur. She helps women who have “made it” on the outside feel great about themselves on the inside so they can find joy in their lives, kids, and families. Get her free guide: Slowing Down: 9 Steps to Live With Intention to start meaning it when you say you’re doing fine.
